In life it is very easy to get wrapped up in ourselves. After all, some would say that humans are innately self-centered and selfish. However, I choose to believe the best in all people; that there is redemption for all regardless of how they have wronged or hurt me. This may make me seem foolish or weak to you; if that is the case, it is okay with me — that is your perspective after all. I just ask that you listen or rather read on to see why I believe this.
Regardless or whether or not people are innately self-centered or selfish, current society does its best to create in us the belief that our role in life is to get the best out of it for ourselves and that relationships and friendships exist for solely what we get out of them. However, I believe that nothing could be farther from the truth. We exist for that which we can supply to others' lives and for that which we can add to the existences of others, whether or not it is at our expense. In addition to the drive of society to sell us a selfish viewpoint of life, there is also this perpetual need to be busy and doing something, anything, and if you slow down at all to compare what you are doing to the lives of those around you. Busyness and selfishness are in direct opposition of loving others and being available to be a change agent in the life of another human.
Relationships are not for what we can get out of them or out of another person. Relationships are not to be played with simply so that one is not alone. Instead, relationships are for what we can pour into another human, whether it is platonic or romantic in nature. This notion has the power to be a perspective changer in that it is in direct opposition of popular belief. It is easy to believe that those circumstances that are a struggle when single will be miraculously better by being in a relationship. However, if you are not happy single, you will not be happy in a relationship. If you are not financially stable single, no relationship can save your finances or take the pressure off in that area. Relationships are not for entering into casually or as a flight of fancy because in that case one party or the other will always end up with a broken heart. We must take care of our friendships and relationships. To take care of them is to invest in them. An investment must be made in the form of time, love, encouragement, support, strength, presence, prayer, and sacrifice. When doing life with others, it will always require a sacrifice. That sacrifice will look different for every person, in every relationship, and depend on the circumstances being faced.
It is only by getting out of this societal view of selfish living that we can really begin to live. We must become less, others must become more, and Jesus must become Most! It has almost been a week since a good friend, partner in ministry, amazing wife and mother, sincere and genuine person, and a servant leader left this world to go be in the presence of Jesus. While my heart aches for the last conversations we had and to see her smile again, I know that my sorrow is merely a trifle compared to that of her husband, children, and family. This has shaken me and awaken me yet again to how we cannot allow ourselves to get wrapped up in our own individual existences. Instead, we must live this life to be poured out to all those around us whether we have been friends for 20 years, enemies for a time, spouses/significant others, coworkers, or strangers that have yet to meet on the street. I am reminded to live in such a way that every moment is made available to be used by God regardless of the sacrifice I must make.
It is in light of this circumstance and other past circumstances in my life that I choose to see the light in every single person. Every person has within them something that no other person on the planet has; it is that something that I want to draw out of everyone I encounter. I will choose to see the gold in people even where others or they themselves may see dirt. I will choose to love others regardless of our history or what they do or do not do for me. I will choose to forgive and forgive again those by whom I have been or will be hurt. You have light within you, you have hope within you, you have purpose within you, you have a future within you, you have goodness within you, and you have love in you. I see it, even if you do not. I am here. You are not alone. Even more than I see it and offer my presence, God sees it, knows it, and created it in you. You are more than you can ever imagine. So live and live well in hope and in love.
